Creating Win-Win Situations

October 12th, 2009

Do you remember the first time you tried to convince your parents to say yes? Maybe you were asked by a friend to sleep over, or wanted that new red bike for your birthday.  Immediately, you may have thought to yourself, what can I say to convince my parents to say yes?  You began an internal search for ways to make the situation a win-win for both of you.  When you approached them, you listed reasons why it would be a favorable decision.  You made endless promises to be on best behavior. As you continued on, the tone of your voice showcased how excited you would be if the answer was yes. You were so confident in the information that you presented, you were certain they were going to say yes.  Then, out of nowhere your mother says, “No, not right now.”

You refused to give up and began to persuade your parents by giving a little back to them. For instance, you would clean your room for a week, be nice to your sibling, and you would eat your vegetables without frowning. Your parents heard how passionate you had become and finally agreed to the new bike or the first sleepover. You didn’t know it then, but you had just won your first sales negotiation.

What was it about this childhood experience that made your strategy effective?  You didn’t have any advanced education, sales training, rehearse your lines in front of a mirror, carry a training manual, or even have a prepared dialogue. Your strategy was effective because you exercised your natural ability to set the agenda, change strategy mid-stream and to offer a win-win situation. This natural ability to negotiate, change strategy and compromise was probably much stronger as a child than it as an adult in the real world.

How much more effective would we be if we only let our prospects know up front what our agenda is? Just imagine if you made your next call or attended your next meeting with an established set of rules and a strong upfront agreement on what would be decided in the meeting. And what if you decide you are going to get a yes no matter what; even if it means you have to change your strategy mid-stream.

The basic art of selling does not limit itself to only closing business deals; rather it is a process that can be used in every aspect of life.  Remember, you have won many times when it comes to getting what you want. And I’ll bet the majority of those wins were times when you didn’t even know you were selling.  The key to success is applying the principles necessary to create win-win situations in life, no matter what the situation, selling or not selling.

Paul Lushin

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