Need for Approval

August 23rd, 2010

So this past weekend I was in Chicago with the girls. As we shopped, dined out and went out on the town I could not help but notice all of the different types of people – how they carried themselves, how they dressed, how they acted, what they drove, etc.  As I observed all of this I got to thinking why do some people try so hard and yet others so little and then it came to me – NEED FOR APPROVAL! I am not saying that those who did not dress as nice or behave in a particular manner had no need for approval but if those that did truly did not care what others thought of them why would they bother?

As women I think we try so hard to avoid the stereotypes that we don’t want to be associated with and even try harder to be viewed in the manner that we perceive as favorable. Not only does this happen in a social setting but also in our professional lives. I know I have thought twice at times about asking gutsy questions in sales situations so that I did not come across as demanding or even “bitchy”. I did not want to be “that girl”. The thing we have to remember is that we gain respect by the questions we ask and that it is more important to be respected than liked. Wouldn’t you rather be a respected professional that knows her stuff than someone that is just nice.

Need for approval is one of those weaknesses that I believe all people have – some just more than others. When times get tough for me and I am beating myself up I just remind myself that it is none of my business what other people think of me.

Karen Casey

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